Reflections: One year ago on tishabav I spent the day on a couch in a tiny three roomed hut in the big bear mountains with strep throat, fasting while watching my three babies aged 3, 2 and 4 months. Nursing. Feeling weak. I didn’t get off the couch once til about 12 maybe, wanting to conserve every last bit of my energy to be able to nurse my baby while I fasted. Yet I didn’t feel drained. My body was weak, but my soul was on fire, electrifying my every thought and moment. I felt alive and happy. Why? How did I feel so inspired and uplifted laying on a couch in a hut in the middle of the summer with out air conditioning watching three babies and fasting? What was the secret to why that day for me was so moving, powerful, and experiential, and lasted until today, when I begin to prepare for this tishabav, a whole year later?
It was quite simple- see, on that couch I didn’t mention one detail. I had my phone in hand. And I was using it- (gasp) on instagram. (Double gasp).
The entire feed of instagram on that day was link after link to powerful movies, clips, stories and speeches that elevated my soul beyond that little hut in the middle of Big Bear, California.
That, my friend, is the power of content. Utilize it! Uplift your soul by feeding it healthy doses of meaningful inspiration that will impact you for an entire year later. As I laid on that couch, tears streaming down my face from the beautiful stories I was watching, and powerful soul searching wisdom I was hearing, I felt alive and energized, no mater what my physical state looked and felt like.
Tap into the content that is out there. Choose good food for your soul.
Content that inspires you up until the very day it’s meant to - until the next holiday comes around for you to dig in even deepers. Here are my tishabav reflections for This year, and some of that fabulous content I was referring to.
And much more- do research. Legit just chabad.org and Aish.com
Great people on instagram to follow (if you do) for good content
my personal preparation for tishabav, the ninth of Av
god conscious - are we mindful of gd in every aspect and element, and conscious that it’s for our best?
Why are we sad? Bc I don’t live with that consciousness
My ego and my body still rule over my soul so much of the time
I am not the greatest person I could be
I have not treated others with the respect they deserve and I know I could have treated them with
My insides don’t always reflect my outsides, and my outsides don’t alwaYs reflect my insides
I have not managed to fully achieve using physicality for purely spirituality.
Who I am, what my home is, what my time, actions, choices thoughts and speech are - do not fully and completely show gd in this world. I am meant to be a Beit haMikdash - a living walking example of gdliness on this earth and I am not that ! All My actions do not align with who i want to be yet.
My insides are not purified to the point that I react animalisticly occasionally - if my kid hits his baby brother, I shriek at him before realizing what I am doing and then feel embarrassed of my actions! Truly living gd conciously means you are a walking talking representation of gd on this earth, you are CONSCIOUSly choosing all of your actions.