An Open Letter To God

Hashem,

I feel so afraid and alone

I am not sure how I can handle/accomplish/do all these things you expect of me by myself. I am not sure how to even take the next step sometimes when I am in this mode of survival. Just breathe. Just take the next breath. When things change and are not what we’re used to, when we don’t have what we’re used to having, we have to become the anchor for our own ships, our own lives. And doing that is scary. Anchoring a ship can be hard, strenuous and sometimes seem so futile as the wind whips and waves crash constantly. But if we can find the power to send out our anchor deep enough into ourselves, then we will hit the rock that the anchor will hook onto and soothe our ship. The rock will only anchor your ship if it comes from within, someone else’s anchor won’t calm your ship. A different rock won’t fit your anchor. What’s your why? Does every moment of your life agree with it? I hope it does. If it doesn’t maybe we don’t have a big or deep enough rock for the anchor to hold onto.

Hashem, I want to feel calm and meet life’s challenges with serenity and grace. I want to embrace life to its fullest with radiant happiness and subsuming joy. Like a sunflower opening towards the sun, I want my soul to beam up and out towards You with confidence, beauty and pride. A seed only becomes a sunflower once through its underground internal journey, so too we also must go through our processes that seem futile. What’s a green stem with a bulb on top days before it blooms?

Please Hashem help me embrace my journey, and welcome the challenges with warmth, spirit, resolve and grit. I want to be the person who faces life head on with a twinkle in my eye, smile on my face and a strong confident posture. I can do this, and I will do this. Help me help myself, so I can achieve YOUR will for me to be my best self, with every intention You have for me.

Love,

Me